Frequently Asked Questions!

Security Q&A:

Why does my profile name need to match the name on my ID?

This requirement enables us to ensure that the customer ordering one of our unique works of art is the same person who receives the art. Further, matching profiles with IDs ensure that any gifts given by us as a token of our appreciation are provided only to adults that are 21 years old or older. In the District of Columbia it is illegal for anyone under 21 years of age to possess cannabis. Without a valid ID that matches a customer's profile name we are unable to establish the customers age and will not provide our canine art or any gifts.

What does VALID ID mean in the context of setting up a profile and confirming identity?

A valid Government Issued Photo ID in this context is a driver’s license, a state issued photo ID, or a passport. If expiration is no more than SIX months old, ONE additional document showing your name and your current address at the time of delivery will be needed. The most important part of ‘VALID’ will be the expiration date. We will not conduct any sort of sale or business with an out of date/expired ID.

What is a “valid form of identification?”

The identification must be a government-issued driver’s license, identification card, or U.S. passport. The issuing government must be a U.S. State or territory in the case of driver’s licenses and identification cards. District Derp®  will not accept foreign passports or foreign-government issued identification cards. Further, we will not accept expired driver’s licenses or identification cards.

How do I know that my personal information is secure and my privacy will not be compromised?

Our site is certified Level 1 PCI DSS compliant.  We are very serious about securely hosting our online store and have invested significant time and money to ensure that our solution is PCI compliant. We will NEVER share your information with ANY external party.  

How It Works Q&A:

How do I purchase cannabis from District Derp®?

District Derp® DOES NOT sell cannabis. We are an art company providing customers with unique art painted by our in-house canine artist Sudo. Any cannabis provided to a customer is provided solely as a token of our appreciation for your support of Sudo and her artistic pursuits.

What is Initiative 71 and how does it work?

Initiative 71 (“I-71”) was passed by District of Columbia voters in 2014 and went into effect on February 26, 2015. Under the law, persons over the age of 21 are permitted to possess, transport, transfer, and grow limited amounts of marijuana. I-71 expressly prohibits the direct selling of marijuana outside of the District’s medical cannabis program.

How old do I need to be to receive a gift with my purchase?

Although anyone can purchase one of Sudo’s canine creations, District Derp® will only provide a gift for the purchase if the customer is 21 years of age or older.  Any customer receiving a gift with a purchase of canine art must present a valid form of identification upon delivery.

Can you deliver outside of the District of Columbia?

No, we do not deliver outside of the District of Columbia.

Can I take my gift outside of the District of Columbia?

I-71 is a District of Columbia law and, as such, only permits the recreational possession and consumption of marijuana within the District of Columbia. Further, out surrounding states have very different takes on cannabis and you should never cross state lines while in the possession of cannabis, no matter where you obtained it.

Are there any limitations on where in the District of Columbia I can consume my gift?

Please know that public consumption of cannabis in the District of Columbia is strictly forbidden and can be harshly enforced. The ONLY appropriate place to consume cannabis in the District of Columbia is within a private residence.

Are the owners of District Derp® doctors?

We don’t even play ones on television! All statements and claims concerning the medical benefits of consuming cannabis are informational only and obtained from outside sources. The content is not intended to be a substitute for professional medical advice, diagnosis, or treatment. Always seek the advice of your physician or other qualified health provider with any questions you may have regarding a medical condition and/or the benefits of cannabis.

What is the minimum purchase amount for pickup and delivery?

The minimum purchase amount required for any order is $40

Is there a delivery fee?

Delivery fees are structured as follows:

$20 for Local Delivery of orders between $45 and $65

$15 for Local Delivery of orders between $66 and $85

$10 for Local Delivery of orders between $86 and $100

$5 for Local Delivery of orders between $100 and $300

Free Delivery for $300+

There is no charge for pickup orders

What if I miss my delivery or am late to my pickup?

We have a 10 minute grace period for deliveries and pickups. Please contact us ASAP if you are running late, need to reschedule, or must cancel your order.

If you miss your delivery or fail to meet your driver within the grace period, we will have to leave and will not fulfill your order. If you would like us to reschedule your delivery, a $10 fee will be added to your total.

If you are late to your pickup and fail to give us reasonable notice, we will have to reschedule your order to a later time.

Can I place an order outside of business hours?

No. All pickup and delivery orders can only be fulfilled during our hours of operations. There are no exceptions.

Is there a limit on the amount of gifts that can be given with any purchase?

Yes, there are limits to the amount of edible and/or flower gifts one can receive with their purchase.

Per Initiative 71 and District Derp® policy, a person can be gifted up to 1 ounce (28 grams) of cannabis flower per week. Any more than this will be in violation of the letter and spirit of the law. 

Per District Derp® policy, there is also a limit on the number of edible gifts one can receive with any given purchase. This is to ensure all of our clients are given the same opportunity to enjoy our delicious treats and to prevent hoarding.

In a single order, one may be gifted a maximum of: 

 - Two (2) premium edibles of a single type.

 - Three (3) standard edibles of a single type.

If we find that your order has surpassed these limits, you will be notified and we’ll work with you to modify it accordingly.

Payments Q&A:

Why can’t I pay with a credit card or another payment processing service?

This is a bit of a complicated question.  Because cannabis is federally illegal, the major credit card networks (Visa, Mastercard, American Express) and mobile payment services (Venmo, CashApp, Zelle) will not work with cannabis-related companies.  We cannot and will not comment on the practices of other related services.  

Can I use coins to pay for my order?

Absolutely not. District Derp® does not accept coins.

What payment methods are accepted at District Derp®?

Cash and Everyware Text2Pay (ACH) on delivery are accepted. If you choose Everyware Text2Pay (ACH), you will receive a text from (202) 301-2689 with a link to complete your payment. We ask that you set up your Everyware profile (i.e. connect to your bank account) prior to our arrival for delivery or pick up. Once it is set up, you're good and you will just need to either reply "Yes" to the text message or click the payment link in said text message to complete your purchase and payment.

Is this completely compliant with all applicable laws and regulations?

Yes. Compliance is our top priority and when you work with us, you can have the peace of mind knowing that we are constantly working to stay up to date with state and federal regulations to ensure our payment solutions always remain compliant.

Are there any fees associated with paying via Everyware Text2Pay (ACH)?

Yes, the processor that we use charges a $3.00 convenience fee, which will automatically be added to your order total at the time of processing.

Art and Impact Q&A:

How did you train Sudo to paint in the first place?

This was a long process, but it essentially comes down to three commands and a modified paintbrush.

First, we taught her how to hold a brush.  We found, however, that it was unnatural for her to hold the paintbrush in her mouth and look at the canvas sideways. We needed to customize her paint brush. Sudo, has always been a huge fan of sticks.  So every time she went out in the morning, she’d pick up a stick, keep it for the rest of the day, and hold it in her mouth while on her next walk.

Building on this, we shaved down a thick stick until it was thin enough to fit in her mouth comfortably, but thick enough that it could be drilled into without breaking it. We had cut a paint brush in half, drilled a hole in the middle of the stick, and superglued the paint brush inside of the hole we had just drilled.  This leaves you with a T-shaped brush that she can hold comfortably and naturally look straight at the canvas while she paints. Once she was able to hold the brush for a long period of time, we taught her to only drop it when we say “leave it.” She will then drop it in your hand.

Finally, the hardest part, was teaching how to touch the brush to the canvas. The rest was just making it fun for her!

How did you both get involved with Homewards Trails Animal Rescue and why?

When we first volunteered at Homewards Trails we were told about the humble beginnings of Homewards Trails - one woman deciding to take whatever action she could to help find forever homes for the cats and dogs she rescued from kill shelters. What started as the adoption of three dogs from a terrible fate has grown into one of the few no-kill shelters in DC, with over 21,000 animals rescued and adopted. Their ethos revolves around the idea that all lost, abandoned, and abused dogs deserve to get better and find their forever family - this means taking in animals until they’re adopted, no matter what, ensuring proper medical and behavioral training, taking in animals no matter the breed, age, and health, and assisting community partners in their mission to help animals. Every dollar that goes to Homeward Trails goes to furthering this work and we couldn’t be more proud to contribute to their cause!

Why you chose Sudo's breed vs shelter pet?

The answer here is two-fold. We never saw it as an either/or choice. One of us grew up around this breed and found it to be a wonderful twist of fate when a close family friend needed good homes for a litter of puppies.  Additionally, a medical professional suggested one of us look for a lovable, calm-tempered, puppy for emotional comfort and support --hello, anxiety! Sudo has been our rock and our inspiration in healing.

Do you all help Sudo paint at all?

We pick the color palette, hand the brush over to Sudo to grab in her mouth, and will then adjust the easel to make it easier for her to reach parts of the canvas.  Other than that she does the rest.

Does District Derp® collaborate with outside artists?

Although District Derp® has not previously collaborated with outside artists, we are interested in doing so. If you're an artist with a passion for elevating the art experience, reach out to us at - we'd love to hear from you!

Behind the scenes